it wasn't lemon gatorade
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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