There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
No...this little piggys going to the bar
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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