Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
