he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
