Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
