Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
