It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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