idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
