i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Randomize
