I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Buhtt sex?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
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