one two three fourrrrnication!
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
