He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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