just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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