so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
