Quick, to the slutcave!
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I understand Curling. That high.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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