well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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