no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Randomize
