i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
