No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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