I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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