I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
