But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Randomize
