it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
We left the knife in your bed.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
