she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
And the cops told us we were all naked.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I need to calm my uterus...
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
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