I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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