No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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