ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
