Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
