Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
