It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
