I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
