I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Randomize
