Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
