Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
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