he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
