Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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