Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
