The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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