: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Randomize
