her vagine was all disorganized.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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