Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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