and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
what day is it and did you see me today?
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
