This girl is more easily done than said...
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
