I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Dude, I woke up at my ex's house. I am spooning her half naked roommate. There is a pizza on my shoulder. I need you to come pick me up.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
