woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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