I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Randomize
