Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
