Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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