with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
