Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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