remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
